last week Friday i went out on a little date with my Grandma :) was fun and lovely memories. we went out to Red Lobster and then walked around the mall once. and i found five dollars while outside walking around haha [outside mall] was nice! then on Sunday the whole family got together for a surprise birthday party for my uncle jay who turned 60 and my cousin john who turned 13! they were sure surprised! it was nice because some of the family who live in Florida were there – it was nice getting everyone together. right after i went to a restaurant for Rachel [friend] baby sprinkle. a baby sprinkle i guess is a small second baby shower for a second child of different gender. both parties people bought others gifts … i was unable to give anyone anything because of money. makes me feel bad, but i don’t work and don’t receive disability yet! Leon helps me financially 100%, bur gifts are luxuries.
speaking of feeling bad… i missed a few med doses here and there. im not sure how many but i would say 4-5 maybe? i hate when i fuck up like this. i fall back into my old bad habits and have negative thoughts. this morning i had my first suicidal thoughts again since may – it was scary and over STUPID shit. its sad to know i suffer and struggle. sometimes i feel like i suffer alone … i just need to be more vocal about my thoughts. blah.
hey! i did the Qbee ice cream activity! yay! i didn’t think i was going to participate this month but surprisingly just whipped it up today lol. you like? put 11 frames and pretty rainbow ♥ i’ve been going with the rainbow thing for months now =p my C is my signature and rainbow is my thing. duh, how can you not love all colors ;) ha and on Pinterest i even have an entire rainbow album, in plans for my best friends wedding – the theme she wants! one day, it shall be AWESOME!
oh & PS: it is soooo hot here in Michigan! almost 100 degrees and we are not running our AC this year to save on money. it’s been miserable!